Self-esteem and confidence are major traits in individuals that affect their success. While these are a lifelong process, the foundation of it needs to be established in early childhood. Building self-esteem will allow the child to deal with difficult situations that they will encounter during their lifetime. Since parents have the greatest influence on a child’s belief, it is important for them to let their child know where they belong, how well they are doing and contribute towards developing confidence and self-esteem.
A selection of articles that may help you to Improve your life!
ENERGY PSYCHOLOGY TECHNIQUES
Within my NLP interventions, one of the processes I use is: Energy Psychology.
So let’s address some questions:
One: Can energy psychology techniques change deep emotional patterns permanently and if so where’s the evidence?
Two: How do energy psychology techniques compare with other treatments?
Can energy psychology techniques change deep emotional patterns permanently? YES!
The research published in 2003 ‘Psychotherapy’, which is the journal of the American Psychological Association’s Psychotherapy Division, covers three areas: objective measures, biological changes and changes in the genes. The objective studies have shown that those studied have made changes in their lifestyle and or behaviour that someone other than themselves have been able to report. The biological changes (changes that have occurred in the body that can’t be faked), looked at stress chemistry, and particularly cortisol.
In one study an energy psychology tapping session was compared with a non-directive counselling session. In the tapping session, not only did the subject get better improvement in the subjective measures, but also their cortisol levels went down far more significantly than for the other group.
The third area studied was to do with the expression of the genes. Genes are very responsive to what happens in the environment which determines what they give out.
A study that was presented at ACEP in Reston, Virginia showed that one of the genes involved with PTSD actually stopped expressing itself as much after an EFT session, but not for a controlled group. Energy Psychology Techniques have been proved to have an effect on; behaviour, cortisol levels and gene expression. They conducted a dismantling study to see if tapping was really an active ingredient in the therapy. They identified all the components of the therapy and took two groups, both groups had the therapy but one group had various components removed one at a time. Components like the 9-gamut technique itself. In three different dismantling studies, they took away the tapping and replaced it with either diaphragmatic breathing or mindfulness meditation.
In both cases the tapping did better.
So, how do energy psychology techniques stand up to established treatments?
Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) is the established treatment for many disorders; PTSD, anxiety and so on. One of the first studies that was published was one working with groups that had PTSD. They had about 400 children in an orphanage in Rwanda. 188 of them were able to remember being orphaned during the genocide twelve years earlier. These children were now in their adolescence and were still at the orphanage.
They gave all 188 children a test to rate their PTSD. Before the treatment 100% of these children all had PTSD symptoms and scored very highly on the test. After treatment, it was down to 6% of the children. 94% had responded to the treatment and a year later, on follow up, only 8% still had symptoms of PTSD. What is extraordinary is that the children only had one session of treatment.
A study of 49 combat veterans in the U.S. who were suffering from PTSD, showed that before treatment they were all 100% within the governments PTSD range. After 6 sessions of treatment, only 14% were still in the PTSD range. That’s an 86% reduction after only six sessions.
So how does that compare with CBT, for treating the people with PTSD?
In one very well thought of study, 24 combat veterans who all met the government’s PTSD criteria 100% each has twelve CBT sessions for their PTSD. After treatment only 60% of them still met the criteria of PTSD. Only 40% where helped to the point where they no longer could be diagnosed with PTSD. Another study, done by the Institute of Medicine, looked at the different studies for PTSD. They singled this study out as one of their stellar studies. If you compare the results of the 6 energy psychology sessions with the 12 CBT sessions, you have;
Two groups each with 100% score for PTSD before treatment
After treatment only 14%, who’d had EFT were still having symptoms of PTSD, versus 60% of those who’d had CBT.
This suggests that when more studies are done and they really look at the all the factors, they may find that Energy Psychology Techniques are actually superior to anything else that’s being practiced at the moment.
The management of our emotional state is essential especially when working under pressure. We experience negative emotions when our lives are not as we want them to be and we become victims of situations, often blaming someone or something else for the way we feel. Being a victim can only result in more pressure in our lives and the lives of those whom we blame.
The only alternative to being an emotional victim is to be the master of our own lives and feelings. Changing from victim to master is not an easy step, because years of conditioning may have gone into believing we are victims and that other people are responsible for our feelings. We even go so far as reinforcing the fact by saying such things as ‘you’ve made me angry’ or you’ve upset me’. Statements like these cement our thoughts into beliefs, which then control our lives; but they are, in fact, lies – no-one can make us angry because anger, like any other emotion, is totally self-generated from our perception of the world.
So, EMOTIONS, are the result of a thought process or conditioned response to an external stimulus. Emotions come from inside us; they are not given to us by other people. All another person can do is create a situation to which we REACT or RESPOND. When we REACT, we disengage our rational thinking, whereas when we RESPOND, we do at least give ourselves a chance to think things through first.
Masters RESPOND…..Victims REACT
The first step in mastering our emotions is to accept the fact that we, as individuals, are responsible for our emotions and that no-one else can give them to us – they can only create situations.
Step two, and this is the harder part, is to break the habit of reacting. Reactions are instantaneous and can save us in life-threatening situations, but, how often are we actually in life-threatening situations? Non life- threatening reactions become habits through repetitious use, but habits are learned……..so they can be broken.
Habits are unconscious actions and we do them without thinking, but they can be broken by taking control of our thoughts. Anything you can consciously do to stop the knee jerk reaction will help break patterns of behaviour. Taking DEEPER, SLOWER breath for example and thinking what to say before you say it will definitely help.
What else could YOU do to break habitual reactions?
The following information, will help you look at negative emotions in a different light. They will help take away some of their acceptability and enable you to see emotions from a different perspective.
WORRY is a major concern for many people. Thousands of people do it every day, yet it’s a futile exercise. It’s making ourselves incapable of enjoying this moment, of being happy now. It’s fantasising about something that hasn’t happened, or has happened and has not been dealt with effectively.
The alternative is constructive, creative thinking aimed at solving the problem. Or you can simply throw the worry away and restructure the thought. If you can’t control the situation, you can control your thought.
Example: ‘I worry about the kids being away’.
Restructured:’ I have taught my kids well, they will have an enjoyable experience’. NOW let the worry go……….
(so ……..are you now saying….’but what if they don’t, they won’t ever want to go away again’)
Then restructure the thought = ‘what ever the outcome, I know I will deal with it effectively when they return’
SHYNESS is simply waiting for someone else to give us reassurance, to tell us that we are alright, to show us some kind of approval. The reality is we ARE alright!
We are unique, different from any other person on this planet. All we have to do is accept that as a fact, be proud of our uniqueness and get on with our lives. If you do this then SHYNESS WONT EXIST.
YOU are responsible for YOU and your own thoughts. If someone calls or refers to you as being Shy, does it really matter?
If it does, then either say to that person or think to yourself…..’yes, it means I am unique in my ways’
REJECTION is another emotion experienced by millions of people yet the only time we can experience it is when we fail to get approval from another person.
Rejection is just an unsuccessful attempt to gain other people’s approval.
Why do we need other peoples approval? What’s wrong with approving of ourselves? That way, we can never experience rejection!
REGRET is another emotion that messes up peoples’ lives. When we regret something, we are actually allowing ourselves to feel inferior because our past performance was not as we wanted it to be.
Regret can be overcome by seeing it as an opportunity to learn. If we regret something then we have found a strategy for living that didn’t work effectively……..therefore it need not be done again!
The past is in the past, it can not be revised or changed…..learn from it and let it go….you are here, in this moment of time, be who you want to be now.
LONELINESS is another common emotion. We are social animals and it is easy to be lonely, but its only experienced when we place the responsibility of our own happiness onto someone else.
Once we accept responsibility for our own happiness, we empower ourselves to seek out new friends.
JEALOUSY can only present itself to us when we believe we are inferior to someone else. When we believe that others are better than us in some way. We are not inferior, different yes, but not inferior. Other people may have what we haven’t, or be able to do what we can’t, but that doesn’t make them any better, it only makes them different. The secret is to change the beliefs we have about ourselves into beliefs that serve us more effectively.
HURT is denial of responsibility for our own feelings. It is placing blame for OUR emotions onto someone else. When someone says ‘You hurt me’, what they are really saying is ‘You didn’t do what I wanted you to do, so I’m having this emotion to show you my displeasure, in the hope that you feel guilty and change your behaviour accordingly’.
GUILT is an emotion that many people use as a tool to manipulate other people. It’s used to make you feel bad when you haven’t done something someone else wanted you to do. When we feel guilty for something, we feel we’ve done wrong; we are indulging in a concern over a past situation, instead of accepting that we’ve made a mistake, seeing it as a learning experience, and getting on with the rest of our lives.
FEAR is a normal reaction of a human being in a life-threatening situation. It was originally used as a life-saving mechanism to flood our bodies with the chemicals necessary for flight or fight from danger. For many people, after years of practice, it has become a Fantasised Experience, Appearing Real. They consciously feed the mind with doom and gloom instead of facing the thing they fear and dealing with it effectively. If we face the thing we fear, the death of the fear is certain.
There are many treatments available for individuals, and is meant to help people with their emotional issues, which can range in order of their severity, Neuro Linguistic programming (NLP) can also be very effective. The main aim of this form of therapy is to change the quality of life by defining the path of life clearly, and bringing in more clarity. Whether it is the problem of repressed childhood that you are facing, or an emotional breakdown due to divorce, failure or loss of a loved one, asking for help is the first step to taking positive action.
There are many emotional issues that find a corner in our heart, and refuse to go away. With time, these issues can transform into a sort of emotional blockage that impacts negatively on our daily life, such as lack of concentration, enthusiasm, self respect, willingness to change, encouragement, and so on. These issues can spiral into our lives in various ways and gets channelled into other zones, which can create problems in relationships, professional life, and health.
You are a VIP! You are responsible for yourself and your own thoughts, feelings and actions. Whilst you may be able to influence others, you can not be responsible for anyone else’s thoughts but your own.
Therefore it makes sense to put yourself first doesn’t it? Until you are happy and contented, those around you will not be either.
The main aim of NLP therapy is to change the quality of life by defining the path of life clearly, and bringing in more clarity.
Anxiety is something that exists in everyone’s life to a certain extent, and in a way it is medically known to be helpful as well. Because, anxiety helps us stay alert and be reactive to our circumstances, whether joyful or painful. However, when the anxiety reaches the stage where it overwhelms you mentally and physically, and affects your normal routine of life, its time to ask yourself if you want to change this behaviour.
It has been believed for centuries that as we grow older, our brain functions continue to deteriorate, which also impacts and weakens our memory. However, recent medical researches and experiments have proved that our brain has the ability to grow new neurons, even as we age, a process known scientifically as neuroplasticity. The mental health of a person depends vastly on how active the person is – physically and mentally. If you keep forgetting things too quickly, or have noticed a sharp decline in your mental health in terms of memory recently, it is time to make some really important changes in your lifestyle to help sharpen and improve your memory.
In today’s competitive world, sleep is more of a luxury than a necessity. Sleep is important for the well being, both emotionally and physically for an individual. Insufficient sleep or no sleep has long lasting health and psychological disorders. If you have been experiencing insomnia, it may be due to a number of factors, including stress, anxiety or depression. In order to address your sleep problem, it is best to consult someone who can help you change your behaviour, manage feelings and emotions that may interfere with your sleep.
Here are some of the common steps that you will need to take so that you can change your habits and in the process improve your sleep: